Crazy Christmas Eve

We plan and plan for special days. We think in getting the details the way we think they ought to be that everything will be better. Then the craziness begins. The plan and reality do not cooperate. What do we really think we control? What else do we need but to be safe in the hands of God. When we come to understand His safety and protection, we can actually enjoy the craziness all around.

Here are a few of the highlights from Christmas Eve 2009:

• Walmart had no pumpkin, but Super Mercado Monterrey did. Super Mercado Monterrey had no manzana but Walmart did
• Getting a prescription filled at Walgreens in 5 minutes (is that possible?)
• A call from Peru to ask about a recipe
• Videos made in the snow
• Grilling fajitas in the snow (well maybe more drizzle)
• Attempted enforcement of traditions by the youngest.
• Electricity going out
• All but one of the online purchase being delivered
• Not only tracking Santa, but also Caleb as a 4.5 hour trip turned into 12 hours
• Children asking to sleep late on Christmas morning (except for one)

It is better living to be watching for the unexpected than expecting the living to follow our plan. May you enjoy a life of watching God do more than you can explain or imagine. 

Song of the Day 

Hark! the Herald Angels Sing

Weezer

Dedicated to my kids (thanks for giving me the joy of being your father)

Hark the herald angels sing
"Glory to the newborn King!
Peace on earth and mercy mild
God and sinners reconciled"
Joyful, all ye nations rise
Join the triumph of the skies
With the angelic host proclaim:
"Christ is born in Bethlehem"
Hark! The herald angels sing
"Glory to the newborn King!"

Love and Like

Greg McKenzie wrote the following recently:

I've heard that love is a verb, not a feeling. It's something we do, a choice we make. That's an important thing to understand if you plan to love your enemy, or even just your neighbor. This jives well with the other proverb I've heard. I don't have to like you, I just have to love you. I guess that liking in that scenario is the feeling and love is the doing. The point is, we must choose to act in love even in the absence of positive feelings toward others.

I wonder, though, if the real force of Christian teaching isn't undermined by the idea of loving without liking. Looking at myself, suspicion arises when the enormous feeling of relief follows the realization. I can still despise you? Loath you? All I have to do is take the moral high road and treat you nice? Whew, that was a close one. Now, I'll admit, treating an enemy with love is no small thing. But somehow it's not as hard if I don't have to stop feeling disgust, scorn, resentment or animosity.

Maybe that is the sense of Jesus' comparison of murder with anger, insult, and contempt. Maybe it's not so easy to compartmentalize emotion and action. Maybe like is a verb too.

Great thoughts. Here is what I added:

I think like follows love. That is why love is first. Often I will not love someone if I have to like them first. When I truly love, I then come to like the person that fear, prejudice and ignorance once prevented me from liking. As I grow in Christ I desire to have a smaller gap between loving and liking. Someday I may even approach being like Jesus in the ability to love and like at the same time.

May you find someone more likable today. See them as Jesus sees them. Live for Him, show the world that he is still among us.

Song of the Day:
Emmanuel, God With Us
Amy Grant

Dedicated to Robbie Goldman

We dim the light.
We stoke the fire.
We breathe the evergreen.
Young ones wait
While the old ones make up
Tales of how it used to be.

China dolls,
Candy corn,
Painted wooden toys,
Treasures found
To the wondrous sound
Of carolling the savior
Born to us on christmas morn.

Emmanuel, God with us,
Emmanuel!
Emmanuel, God with us,
The son of Israel

And still he calls
Through the night,
Beyond the days of old.
A voice of peace
To the weary ones,
Who struggle with the human soul.

All of us,
Travellers,
Through a given time.
Who can know
What tomorrow holds?
But over the horizon,
Surely you and I will find.

Emmanuel, God with us,
Emmanuel!
Emmanuel, God with us,
The son of israel.

And the years they come,
And the years they go,
Though we may forget somehow
That the child once born in bethlehem
Is still among us now.

Emmanuel, God with us, (emmanuel.)
Emmanuel! (emmanuel.)
Emmanuel, God with us, (emmanuel.)
The son of israel. (israel.)
The son of israel.
The son of is...israel. (son of israel.)

Christmas Puzzle

I like jigsaw puzzles. They stress some people but it is a great way for for to relax and think. For a number of years I have put together the same Christmas puzzle:

One year I was giving my kids a hard time about not helping on the puzzle. To get more assistance, I suggested that the child who helped the most would inherit the puzzle after my departure. This year Hannah worked hard with me on the puzzle so that it would be done before Sarah came home from college. The competition for "favorite child" is great fun.

I do not know who will "win" the puzzle. However after I am gone, I know this puzzle will bring back many memories. I know it will represent many fun times.

How will you be remembered?


Song of the Day

12 Days of Christmas (with a nod to Toto)
Straight No Chaser

Dedicated to Zach (keep after me)

On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me

doo doo do do doot dooooooo
doo doo do do doot dooooooo

On the twelfth day my true love gave to me
12 drummers drumming like olympus above the Serengeti
11 pipers piping,
10 lords a leaping

9 ladies dancing they were dancing for meeee
8 maids a milking they were milking just for me

I had Christmas down in Africa
I had Christmas down in Africa
I had Christmas down in Africa (5 golden rings)
I had Christmas down in Africa (5 golden rings)
I had Christmas down in Africa (5 golden rings)
gonna deck the halls and do the things we never had

doo doo do do doot dooooooo
doo doo do do doot dooooooo
partridge in a big pear tree
partridge in a big pear tree

Fall Back!

There are some things that everyone seems to like. Falling back from Daylight Saving Time is universally anticipated. Therefore I suggest that we fall back at 2 am the first Sunday of each  month. :D

Song of the Day

We Want a Rock
They Might Be Giants

Dedicated to One More Hour

Everybody wants prosthetic
Foreheads on their real heads
Everybody wants prosthetic
Foreheads on their real heads

Poisoned Candy

One of the scariest days for some parents is Halloween. The fear is not of demons or witches, but of tainted candy. However it is not a factual fear. Joel Best of the University of Delaware studied this issue, going back to 1958. He found no report of a child being killed by tainted Halloween candy. Nothing wrong with being safe and using common sense. However I dislike the use of irrational fear to direct actions. Many things are possible but not probable. For those who need something to fear and also like candy corn:

Song of the Day

Mother
Pink Floyd

Dedicated to all who struggle with fear (may you break down the walls)

Mother, do you think they'll drop the bomb?
Mother, do you think they'll like this song?
Mother, do you think they'll try to break my balls?
Mother, should I build the wall?
Mother, should I run for President?
Mother, should I trust the government?
Mother, will they put me in the firing line?
Is it just a waste of time?

Hush now baby, baby, don't you cry
Momma's gonna make all of your nightmares come true
Momma's gonna put all of her fears into you
Momma's gonna keep you right here under her wing
She won't let you fly, but she might let you sing
Momma's will keep Baby cozy and warm
Oooo Babe
Oooo Babe
Ooo Babe, of course Momma's gonna help build the wall

Mother, do you think she's good enough
For me?
Mother, do you think she's dangerous
To me?
Mother will she tear your little boy apart?
Mother, will she break my heart?

Hush now baby, baby, don't you cry
Momma's gonna check out all your girlfriends for you
Momma won't let anyone dirty get through
Momma's gonna wait up until you get in
Momma will always find out where you've been
Momma's gonna keep Baby healthy and clean
Oooo Babe
Oooo Babe
Ooo Babe, you'll always be Baby to me

Mother, did it need to be so high? 

Where Was This Google All This Time

More from William Kamkwamba, the boy who built a windmill from a picture and brought electricity to his village.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
William Kamkwamba
www.thedailyshow.com

What can you do with the abundant resources that you have?

Song of the Day

Grace
U2

Dedicated to Dry Bones and everyone making a difference

Grace
She takes the blame
She covers the shame
Removes the stain
It could be her name

Grace
It's a name for a girl
It's also a thought that
Changed the world

And when she walks on the street
You can hear the strings
Grace finds goodness
In everything

Grace
She's got the walk
Not on a ramp or on chalk
She's got the time to talk

She travels outside
Of karma, karma
She travels outside
Of karma

When she goes to work
You can hear the strings
Grace finds beauty
In everything

Grace
She carries a world on her hips
No champagne flute for her lips
No twirls or skips
Between her fingertips

She carries a pearl
In perfect condition
What once was hurt
What once was friction
What left a mark
No longer stings

Because grace makes beauty
Out of ugly things

Grace finds beauty
In everything

Grace finds goodness
In everything

Write a Book

On occasion, it has been suggested to me that I might write a book. I am not adverse to the to this project, however there is something more important. Whether or not I every write a book, I want to be a book. I want my life to be read as a witness to the power of God.


2 Corinthians 3.3
You show that you are a letter from Christ, the result of our ministry, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts.

May my life reflect in its fragile imperfection the glory that can only come form being shaped by  the art of the hands of God.


Song of the Day
The Poem of Your life
Michael Card

Dedicated to all who walk the path of a disciple



Life is a song we must sing with our days
A poem with meaning more than words can say
A painting with colors no rainbow can tell
A lyric that rhymes either heaven or hell
We are living letters that doubt desecrates
We're the notes of the song of the chorus of faith
God shapes every second of our little lives
And minds every minute as the universe waits by

The pain and the longing
The joy and the moments of light
Are the rhythm and rhyme
The free verse of the poem of life

So look in the mirror and pray for the grace
To tear off the mask, see the art of your face
Open your ear lids to hear the sweet song
Of each moment that passes and pray to prolong
Your time in the ball of the dance of your days
Your canvas of colors of moments ablaze
With all that is holy
With the joy and the strife
With the rhythm and rhyme of the poem of your life
With the rhythm and rhyme of the poem of your life

World Champion

If I were going to be a world champion at something, I would want to be world champion at something like the guy in the following video:



There should always be people who do not get it and ask, "Why?"

Song of the Day

Dedicated to all who live in the paradox of confusion

Running to Stand Still
U2

And so she woke up
Woke up from where she was lying still
Said I got to do something
About where we're going
Step on a steam train
Step out of the driving rain
Maybe run from the darkness in the night

Singing ha la la la de day
Ha la la la de day ha la la de day

Sweet the sin
Bitter the taste in my mouth
I see seven towers
But I only see one way out
You got to cry with out weeping
Talk without speaking
Scream without raising your voice
You know I took the poison from the poison stream
Then I floated out of here

Singing ha la la la de day
Ha la la la de day ha la la de day

She runs through the streets
With her eyes painted red
Under a black belly of cloud in the rain
In through a doorway she brings me
White gold and pearls stolen from the sea
She is raging, she is raging
And the storm blows up in her eyes
She will suffer the needle chill
She is running to stand still

Batman

Saw this today.
Saw this and laughed out loud.
Saw this and thought of Casey Mott!
:D

Song of the Day
Even Better Than the Real Thing
U2

Dedicated to Casey Mott

Give me one more chance
And youll be satisfied
Give me two more chances
You wont be denied

Well my heart is where its always been
My head is somewhere in between
Give me one more chance
Let me be your lover tonight

(check it out)

Youre the real thing
Yeah the real thing
Youre the real thing
Even better than the real thing
Child...

Give me one last chance
And Im gonna make you sing
Give me half a chance
To ride on the waves that you bring

Youre honey child to a swarm of bees
Gonna blow right through you like a breeze
Give me one last dance
Well slide down the surface of things

Youre the real thing
Yeah the real thing
Youre the real thing
Even better than the real thing
Child...

Were free to fly the crimson sky
The sun wont melt our wings tonight

Oh now...here she comes

Take me higher
Take me higher
You take me higher
You take me higher

Youre the real thing
Yeah the real thing
Youre the real thing
Even better than the real thing
Even better than the real thing
Even better than the real thing

Living with Hope

It is a fine balance; living with hope, expecting more and better and at the same time being content with what you have. I want to be dissatisfied with what is wrong, not settling for things to remain just as they are and at the same time to be excited by what could and not dissatisfied with the way they turn out at the present.

It has to be hope. Hope allows us to know the best is yet to come and yet to wait patiently since we live with the assurance that it will come. That is why we need our young. They still have the ability to live in the present but to look forward with hope. They can see what is and dream of what could be.

Noah captured this spirit perfectly this morning. We have been getting a hint of fall in the last few days. It has been cooler in the morning, the humidity lessening in its oppression. This morning it was 64 degrees. Also we have had a steady downpour since early morning. As we were getting ready for church Noah said, "If it was only 37 degrees cooler it would be snowing!" If you do not live south of the I30 snow barrier you might not understand the full impact of this expectation. In 17 years in Tyler we have never had a snowstorm and only flurries of snow on rare occasions. It is hope that allows Noah see what could be.

As Christians our hope is not just what could be, be what will. We look to that day. The greatest moment in time is yet to be, but it will come. I will see you on that day.

Song of the Day

I Still Haven't Found What I Am Looking For
U2

Dedicated to the new college freshman. May you dream and hope for what can and will be.

I have climbed highest mountains
I have run through the fields
Only to be with you
Only to be with you
I have run
I have crawled
I have scaled these city walls
These city walls
Only to be with you

But I still haven't found what I'm looking for
But I still haven't found what I'm looking for

I have kissed honey lips
Felt the healing in her fingertips
It burned like a fire
(I was) burning inside her

I have spoke with the tongue of angels
I have held the hand of a devil
It was warm in the night
I was cold as a stone

But I still haven't found what I'm looking for
But I still haven't found what I'm looking for

I believe in the Kingdom Come
Then all the colors will bleed into one
Bleed into one
But yes I'm still running

You broke the bonds
And you loosed the chains
Carried the cross
Of my shame
Oh my shame
You know I believe it

But I still haven't found what I'm looking for
But I still haven't found what I'm looking for
But I still haven't found what I'm looking for

On Her Birthday

Today is the day, October 3, on which my mother was born. I honor her memory today with a story...

When I was about to get married my mom gave me a wrapped present. It was a small, jewelry type box. I opened it to find two small strips of cloth. She asked, "Do you know what those are?" Since I had no idea I responded, "No." She went on to tell me they were the apron strings. She then explained that she understood that I was starting my family. She was "cutting the apron strings. She expected for my loyalty to be to my new wife and future kids. She gave me permission to put my family before her, my dad and my siblings. She had loved me and now she was setting me free to love as I had never done before.

28 years of marriage and 5 kids later, this remains one of the greatest gifts I ever received. May I bless others in similar ways. May I continue to show the love to others that you showed to me. May I continue to grow love in my family that I first learned from you. May I release it in the next generation.

Song of the Day

Love Grows Love
Caedmon's Call

Dedicated to mom

you said to “put on a happy face”
on a high school stage
but I read what you really meant
in your handwriting on a Bible page
you waited like you told me
though we knew it right away,
it took eight and a half more years
to finally say

I fell in love with you
and that love became something new
it keeps getting stronger
than we ever could have longed
love keeps growing more love

when we got the news
we had to call our families
and start painting the room
a nice, bright blue
our vows they started breathing
and they took on flesh and blood
and we held them in our arms
and tasted God was good

I fell in love with you
and that love became something new
it added a name and it added a smile
it keeps getting bigger every further mile
there on your bended knee
we sewed the seeds of our history
they’re coming up stronger
than we ever could have longed
love keeps growing more love

if love is an echo of the heart
the heart is a canyon
that stretches wild and free
without an end
and breaks through every wall
that holds us in

I’m on the other side of the world
to see what changed you so
my heart breaks with the broken
and it dances with the hope
you told me I would find here
but I could not understand
until I’m walking here beside you
hand in hand

Hope Comes

This video Inspires me to use the abundant resources that I have to the Glory of God. I wished to be blown to new places by the Spirit of God!

Song of the Day

Rushing Wind
Keith Green

Dedicated to All Who Hear the Call

Rushing wind blow through this temple,
Blowing out the dust within,
Come and breathe you breath upon me,
Ive been born again.
Holy spirit, I surrender, take me where you want to go,

Happy Day

Noah has never had a birthday party with any of his friends. We have been in Abilene for ACU camps for everyone of his birthday celebrations. So last night he had a birthday party. His birthday was over 3 months ago, but it did not diminish the celebration. The exact day seems to be overrated. It was the reason and the company that made the night.

God gives us a gift everyday. He gives us a new day. Day to be reminded that we are washed by the blood of His son. A day to celebrate the relationship we have with Him. A day to celebrate the relationship with the people around us. Enjoy today.

Song of the Day #2

Explosions

Devo

Dedicated to Noah (Happy Birthday again!)

We like explosions that leave you feeling good
We like ideas that change the world for good
Theres nothing past the stop n go
Theres nothing but the ebb and flow
Theres nothing like some in and out
Theres nothing more than what you know
We like new places that jets cant take you to
We do like music when it does what it should do
Yes oh yeah
Yes oh yeah
Yes (we like) oh yeah (explosions)
Yes (we like) oh yeah (explosions)
We like explosions its only right we should
We like ideas we thought you understood
We like new places until theyre overrun
We do like music -- loud shots from the big spudgun

Tino Came to Texas

One amazing thing about the family of God is the relationships you can have. Last week a friend from Denver came to visit me in Texas. The thing that is amazing is not that we are friends, but the fact that we even met. I met Tino because I took some kids to Dry Bones in Denver. I went to Dry Bones because my son was interning there for the summer and one of the leaders used to be a punk kid from my home church. This punk kid later was my deacon when I worked in Dallas. Now he was helping my kid learn to be a better servant. Tino used to live on the street, but now reaches out to those who are where he used to be. That is where and why Tino and I became friends.

Tino had never been to Texas before this trip. So I did not mess around. I took him to the best ribs I know of in East Texas. We threw in some Don Juan's, working at the Karing Kitchen, moving walls for the Habitat House, cooking for the Wednesday night meal, and doing some sorting for LTC. After a stop for Taqueria Lugar and Tino fixing his style of ribs for my family, we ended the week with a full day at the Habitat House.

The good news Tino survived the humidity...barely. The better news is that I continue to marvel at the richness of relationships that God puts in my life. I look forward to new adventures with Tino and other people I know, but I also look forward to the adventures with those I have not even met.

Song of the Day

Dirty

Audio Adrenaline

Dedicated to Tino (Great working with you)

Tired of being clean, sick of being proper
I wanna live among the beggars
And dig out in the dirt
Step outside the walls we built to protect us
Don't be afraid to get some mud on your face

Come on, come on everybody
Come on, come on and serve someone

Let's get dirty, let's get used
No matter where you come from
If you're beaten up or bruised
Let's get foolish - let's get free
Free to be the one thing you were meant to be
Let's get dirty

You might get a bruise or some blisters on your fingers
You might start a question and wonder what it's worth
You may slip and fall from the burdens that you carry
But you can't have this treasure
'til you dig it from the dirt

You Think You Have It Rough

The Song of the Day

Dogs of War
Pink Floyd

Dedicated to Caleb ( for the dog and Pink Floyd)

The dogs of war dont negotiate
The dogs of war wont capitulate,
They will take and you will give,
And you must die so that they may live
You can knock at any door,
But wherever you go, you know theyve been there before
Well winners can lose and things can get strained
But whatever you change, you know the dogs remain.

Do My Gifts Matter

I am not a cat lover. But I am not a cat hater either. The best quality of cats is that they mostly stay out of the way. I am glad that we have strange cats (then again that might be all cats). There is Blackard. She is a volunteer cat. She belongs to our neighbor's son's girlfriend. However she spends most of her time at our house. I guess it helps to have a young son who likes cats.

Muffin is the one who is strange. Everyday she comes to the back door and meows. Loudly. We used to think that meant she was hungry. When she meows she may be hungry, but it is not the reason she meows. The reason she wants to get our attention is that she has left us a gift. It is the same kind of gift every time. A leaf. The leaf is usually large and it is an entire leaf. Maybe she heard one of the kids had a biology project? It may be a gift, but not one that I want.

When I give a gift (not just an object but a gift in the broadest sense including friendship, love, assistance), I wonder how my gift is perceived. I hope I am not giving a Muffin Gift. Do I give what I want? Do I give what they want? Or perhaps can I give the gift that is needed?

Every time I hear Muffin I think of the last stanza of a Shel Sivlerstein poem:

And some kind of help is the kind of help
That helping's all about
And some kind of help is the kind of help
We all can do without

What kind of gift do you give?

Song of the Day

Hard Headed Woman
Cat Stevens

Dedicated to Muffin (the hard headed cat)

Im looking for a hard headed woman,
One who will take me for myself,
And if I find my hard headed woman,
I wont need nobody else, no, no, no.

Im looking for a hard headed woman,
One who will make me do my best,
And if I find my hard headed woman
I know the rest of my life will be blessed -- yes, yes, yes.

The Anti-Abraham/Sarah

One of my favorite stories to teach is when Sarah finds out that she will finally have a baby at 90. She laughs. I say, "What else could you do?" That is the only natural reaction to what appears impossible. So here is how I try to make it real...

It is thanksgiving. Your grandmother strikes her glass with a knife to get everyone's attention. She stands and then says, "I have an announcement. I am pregnant." Just try to tell me you would not burst out laughing and I will call you a liar.

Well my 10 year old made his own twist on the story. I joke with my kids about which one will be the first to make their mother a grandmother. I change up my prediction to annoy whoever I want to annoy that day. Well Noah, as only a 10 year-old could manage, said, "It will be me and it happen within two years!" He truly had no idea what he was saying. I am still laughing.

Song of the Day

Handlebars
The Flobots

Dedicated to Noah

I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handlebars
No handlebars

I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handlebars
No handlebars

Look at me, look at me
hands in the air like it's good to be
ALIVE
and I'm a famous rapper
even when the paths're all crookedy
I can show you how to do-si-do
I can show you how to scratch a record
I can take apart the remote control
And I can almost put it back together
I can tie a knot in a cherry stem
I can tell you about Leif Ericson
I know all the words to "De Colores"
And "I'm Proud to be an American"
Me and my friend saw a platypus
Me and my friend made a comic book
And guess how long it took
I can do anything that I want cuz, look:

I can keep rhythm with no metronome
No metronome
No metronome

I can see your face on the telephone
On the telephone
On the telephone

Look at me
Look at me
Just called to say that it's good to be
ALIVE
In such a small world
All curled up with a book to read
I can make money open up a thrift store
I can make a living off a magazine
I can design an engine sixty four
Miles to a gallon of gasoline
I can make new antibiotics
I can make computers survive aquatic conditions
I know how to run a business
And I can make you wanna buy a product
Movers shakers and producers
Me and my friends understand the future
I see the strings that control the systems
I can do anything with no assistance
I can lead a nation with a microphone
With a microphone
With a microphone
I can split the atoms of a molecule
Of a molecule
Of a molecule

Look at me
Look at me
Driving and I won't stop
And it feels so good to be
Alive and on top
My reach is global
My tower secure
My cause is noble
My power is pure
I can hand out a million vaccinations
Or let'em all die in exasperation
Have'em all healed of their lacerations
Have'em all killed by assassination
I can make anybody go to prison
Just because I don't like'em and
I can do anything with no permission
I have it all under my command
I can guide a missile by satellite
By satellite
By satellite
and I can hit a target through a telescope
Through a telescope
Through a telescope
and I can end the planet in a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust

I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handle bars
No handlebars

I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handlebars
No handlebars

The Solution Causes the Problem

I often find that my idea of a solution to a problem often causes unintended new problems. I call this the Tyler method. This method is named in honor of the way Tyler decided to handle traffic on the Loop. For those not from Tyler, the Loop around the city has now been separated in the highest traffic areas by a curbed median. This curbage is designed to replace a center left turn lane. No longer can you turn left into the street or business on the opposite side of the street. Now you must go to the corner and hook a U. Therefore the new problem: accidents occurring near the intersection as one vehicle is making a u-turn. I guess it is improvement to keep the accidents in fewer areas of the Loop? I witnessed it just the other day as the a speeding pickup trying to make the light did not see the smaller SUV making the U for Starbucks, Dairy Queen or some other important destination. The truck put a permanent deep dent tattoo on the right side of the SUV sending it over the curb and across the 3 lanes of traffic on the opposite side. I feel much safer!

Song of the Day

Forward Motion
Relient K

Dedicated to: Whoever decided a curb is progress

Whoa-o...Ive been banging my head against the wall
Whoa-o...for so long it seems I knocked it down, yeah it got knocked down
Whoa-o...and the heating bill went through the roof
Whoa-o...and the wall I knocked down was the proof
That my landlord needed to kick me out

I got evicted now Im living on the street
My spirits lifted...oh wait, that wasnt me
Too many turns have turned out to be wrong
This time I learned that, I knew it all along

When car crashes occur
Then Ill be what you were
When I see what I should
When I see that its good (that its good)

To experience the bittersweet
To taste defeat
Then brush my teeth
Experience the bittersweet
To taste defeat
Then brush my teeth

Cause I struggle with forward motion
I struggle with forward motion
We all struggle with forward motion
Cause forward motion is harder than it sounds
Well everytime I gain some ground
I gotta turn myself around again
Its harder than it sounds
Well everytime I gain some ground
I gotta turn myself around again

Happy Birthday

I am worn down by the a culture that is consumed by consumerism. Buy this, get that, must have this. When Rachel was 3 our TV broke. When we decided not to replace it, she asked,"How am I going to know what to ask for at Christmas?" The message is even understood by 3 year-olds.

So today on my 49th birthday, I will tell you what I want for my birthday. But first what I do not want; no card or presents.

What I want is for you to do something for someone else. If you can do it anonymously that is even better. If it can be for someone who does not deserve it, that is great also. Give a helping hand, show mercy, reflect kindness, impart grace, and spread redemption. You might extend forgiveness, right a wrong, encourage, or wash someone's feet. Look someone in the eye, see the invisible people, talk to the outcast and extend a hand in fellowship. Share from what you have been given.

I would like to ask for world peace. However just do your part by changing one of the 6 billion hearts on our planet.

Song of the Day

Take to the World
Derek Webb

Dedicated to me (it is my BD) and anyone willing to make a difference.

Go in peace to love and to serve
Let your ears ring long with what you’ve heard
And may the bread on your tongue
Leave a trail of crumbs
To lead the hungry back to the place that you are from

And take to the world this love, hope and faith
Take to the world this rare, relentless grace
And like the three in one
Know you must become what you want to save
‘cause that’s still the way
He takes to the world

Go, and go far
Take light deep in the dark
Believe what’s true
He uses all, even you

First Day of School

I dislike how we compartmentalize so many things in our lives. Church here, work there, and school is for learning. Today Some kids started back to school. Others will be joining them next week. My hope is that we are daily learning, reflecting and growing. Just as we should not make church a verb describing what we do, education should be about learning. Everyday should be the first day of school, every day should be about learning.

Song of the Day

Teach Your Children
Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young

Dedicated to Adam (on his first day of teaching)

And you (Can you hear and)
Of tender years (Do you care and)
Can't know the fears (Can you see we)
That your elders grew by (Must be free to)
And so please help (Teach your children)
Them with your youth (You believe and)
They seek the truth (Make a world that)
Before they can die (We can live in)

Treat People Better

When I was in the hospital in April, I had a surprise visit from a doctor I did not know. It was a tough introduction, "Hello , my name is Dr. Palanisamy. I am an oncologist." Not the best opening. The short story is a scan had shown a spot on my right lung. Not what they were looking at, but something that needed to be followed. So last week I had another scan. On Thursday I went to the doctor to get the results. Simple and easy: there is no longer anything there.

Sunday I shared these events with the high schoolers. The question was, what would you have thought or felt if you had found out that you had lung cancer instead of getting the all clear. Great responses. Dalton said he would be scared. Zach thought he would get after his bucket list. Brenna thought that she would be reflective and look back on her life and evaluate how she had lived. But my favorite answer was from Holly, "Treat people better." I smile every time I think of that answer. All of these were great answers to a very complex situation. But to be able to change in the midst of pain, to take hurt and yet to give love, what a wonderful thought.

I will be dissatisfied until I live with the daily realization that I do not need to be diagnosed with lung cancer in order to understand my days are short. I will be dissatisfied until I live with daily transformation and I am treating people better.

Song of the Day

Give Me Your Eyes
Brandon Heath

Dedicated to Holly Stidham

Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me your love for humanity
Give me your arms for the broken hearted
The ones that are far beyond my reach
Give me you heart for the ones forgotten
Give me your eyes so I can see

In Memory of Shadow

Today I attended the memorial service for a friend I knew as Shadow. He was killed in tragic accident while simply waiting on a bus. There is no a human reason that I should have ever known Shadow. My world had no reason to intersect with his. I knew him because of the Karing Kitchen. I knew him because he gave me the opportunity to serve him.

His body had been twisted by two strokes. He did not walk very well. He kept his balance with the help of of a walker. Sometimes even the walker was not enough to keep him up right. Yet I saw him in many different places in town. These places might be miles apart. I never knew where I might see Shadow. He did not allow his disabilities to stop him. Because of this unstoppable spirit I came to respect him.

If Shadow needed something he would ask. Often time I could help; take a cap off a Mountain Dew, get him another roll, or give him a ride home. Other times I might not be able to help; out of bread or not able to take him home. Shadow would always respond with thankfulness and gratitude whether it was a yes or a no. Same response every time. I came to care for him because he showed care for me.

I was driving home late the night he was killed. The next morning I was checking my email and a friend let me know about Shadow. I watched the news report and just began to weep. The loss really hurt. It was then that I realized that Shadow had been serving me. May I be quicker to serve others in the name of the LORD who saves us all.

Song of the Day

You Are My King (Amazing Love)
Newsboys

Dedicated to Shadow

I’m forgiven because You were forsaken
I’m accepted, You were condemned
I’m alive and well, Your Spirit lives within me
Because You died and rose again

Amazing love, how can it be
That You, my King, should die for me?
Amazing love, I know it’s true
It’s my joy to honor You
In all I do, I honor You

BD Month

August is the birthday month at my house. Caleb on the 3rd, Hannah 8th, Tim the 20th and Rachel on the 30th. Thinking about birthdays this month, I have discovered that I am dissatisfied with the amount of time when a person is considered no longer too young but has not become too old. This time must be all of 45 to 50 seconds. Not long for a life. The see-saw shifts quickly.

Others will remind of which side you are on. My kids gave "an over the hill" on my 30th birthday. On the handwritten card, I was not just cresting the hill, but I was already at the bottom of the backside. The chaos in my life is realizing that others put me on either side of the line, just depends on whom I am talking to at the time. Will I be here when everyone agrees that I am only at the bottom of the backside?

Song of the Day:

One Day
Aaron Shust

Dedicated to Spencer Hutchins. (Hope LA is good for you)

One Day I will leave this body
and I will get a perfect one
That day I will see His glory
shining like the noonday sun
One day, I'll take a walk with Jesus
He might explain the mysteries of life

time to write again

I have been silent for too long. Late 2008 and early 2009 presented me with new challenges. So to answer the challenge from 2 of my friends I am committed to being a consistent blogger. I have had plenty to be dissatisfied with in the last year, so it may take me a while to catch up.

The summer of 2009 will be memorable. Mexico, ACU Camps, Wilderness Trek, Alpha, Sooner, VBS and Omega. I did have one open week. So I can be dissatisfied with that.

And now for what will keep me writing (through Thanksgiving at least): Song of the Day

Radar Love
Golden Earring

Dedicated to Denise

I've been drivin' all night, my hand's wet on the wheel
There's a voice in my head that drives my heel
It's my baby callin', says I need you here
And it's half past four and I'm shifting gear